Forty and Fabulous!

I turned 40 recently and I am having the absolute best time. No really, I mean it. All these women that I know who are either going through or have gone through the forth decade of their lives have told me it is or was the best time in their lives. You are at the point where you know who you are, what you want and where you're going and you don't give a shit if anyone likes it or not. I've just begun this incredible journey and it has been pretty amazing so far. I've gotten over trying to be something that feels unnatural to me. If it doesn't feel right or good, I'm not doing it. So I've decided not to pay my taxes anymore! Just kidding. Seriously, I feel a strength and a self assuredness I've never known before. I also don't feel it necessary to be a sounding board for people with negative energy anymore. In the past I felt like they needed me. I was doing my part for the greater good. All they were doing was sucking my energy and leaving me depleted. No more!!! This doesn't mean that I'm not going to be a good listener and give people a safe place to vent. We all need that. I'm just not going to give up my precious energy anymore. They can't have it, dammit!!! I'm trying to be more aware and open to what the universe sends my way. I'm paying more attention when someone comes to mind. I call, text or email them. I figure that they popped in there for some reason; even if it's just to say, "Yo...'sup?". It's nice when someone just calls you out of the blue or sends you a note to say they were thinking of you. I called my sister on the way home from dinner last night just to tell her I miss her. Very out of character for me. I'm trying to also rekindle my sense of humor and laugh more. I sort of lost my sense of humor somewhere along the way this year. Too much working and training, not enough life. I was trying to hard to be an interesting person. Now I just want to be grounded and real. Just me, only better. When it's my time to 'renew' (a reference from Logan's Run) I want only to leave my echo of laughter behind and for people to say, "I'm really going to miss her" and smile when they think of me. No, I don't plan on dying anytime soon, but I'm going to get a headstart on enjoying life a lot more and leaving my positive footprint on this Earth.

Everybody needs a little time away...

I heard her say...from somebuuuuuhdaaaaay. That sappy Chicago song is so very true. Everyone needs a break...from...well...whatever. It's easy to get burned out, even on the things you love. My clients need an occasional break from me and my workouts. Even if they don't know it. Even though I encourage them to just take a little time away, most of the time they get forced into a break. They have to go out of town for work or they must clean out a relative's house. No matter how it happens or what they are faced with doing on that "sabbatical" they come back to me in a different state. It's good to see them with a smile on their faces and ready to get back to it.

I need my breaks too. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do for a living! Absolutely adore all of it! I mean how much better can life get when people pay you for what you are so very passionate about? I genuinely care about the welfare of my clients. Dare I say that most of us are what you might call friends? It's a beautiful thing and a lot of good things happen with the work we do together. I put a lot of thought into each and every person's program or massage. That's exactly why I feel like I need to just step away and breathe in my own needs. We must take care of ourselves. Our culture is really screwed up in the fact that we view 'self care' as 'self-ish'. WTH? How is taking care of ourselves being selfish? In most cases my clients understand. Although, sometimes I get the evil eye and that's okay. I've gotten much better about not starting such an announcement with, "I'm sorry, but...". Feeling the need to apologize for everything is fading off in the distance. In fact, a client/friend of mine sent an email to me of a saying. It was:

Apologizing

Does not always

mean that you're

wrong and the other

person is right.

It just means that you

value your relationship more

than your ego

I now use it most of the time to soften a "NO" answer. It seems so harsh to look at someone and just say "NO". I am a work in progress, though. Most everyone is; there is always the opportunity to learn something. Most of us glaze through our days. We are so consumed with going to the grocery store, putting gas in our vehicles, oh...shoot I can't forget to (fill in the blank) that we don't pick up on things that we should. We are too busy texting while driving to look up in time to see the big sign we just missed. Don't worry the universe will take control of your car, run that red light and get you a ticket (or worse...) to get your attention. Something's gotta give and I keep seeing glimmers of hope that may restore my faith in mankind. Maybe one day they will be full blown star bursts and we can really change the world. I'm keeping my fingers crossed, anyway...