Who's in charge here?

I have come to the conclusion that I no longer control my schedule and it must come to a stop. I feel like I've been suffocating all February and somethin's gotta give. I don't like that feeling. It makes me sort of cranky. I just see a blank space on my calender and have a client standing right in front of me looking at me expectantly to write them into that spot. Well, they probably aren't really thinking that. I just feel obligated to fill all the blank spaces; I don't know why. However, on the flip side, I'm not hurting for income! When you work for yourself you sort of have to suck it up sometimes and just make sure you have your helmet and seatbelt on. I'm also struggling with my training for the Ironman. Not the training itself, but the selfishness I feel because I signed up for the Ironman. It's just something on my list of things I want to do before I die. Hopefully I won't die trying to work and train. Hopefully I won't lose total touch with the people I care most about and I see it happening already. Am I sorry I signed up for the Ironman? NOPE! Not one bit! It's just going to take better planning and I know I will find my groove soon.

Swim training today.
2 x (100 easy drill, 200 easy build) (R:30)
3 x 400 fartlek with :40 rest after each one & done as:
25 fast, 75 cruise, 50 fast, 50 cruise, 75 fast, 125 cruise“Cruise” is feel good speed – not hard.
100 ez nonfree
5 x 100 pull (R:15) strong effort
100 ez
TOTAL= ~2500

Just to let you know, after today's swim, I've done 6300 yds. total this week. I never thought I'd be doing that, but I also never thought 5 years ago I'd be preparing myself for an Ironman. In fact I didn't even know what the hell a triathlon was. Now if you don't know what a fartlek is (stop with the 8th grade boy sense of humor), it is damn hard! That's what it is! Now go Google it!